Low and behold 1 day before the worst day ever, I find out the other SIL is pregnant with her 2nd. That didn't take long considering he just got back from deployment and she was off birth control the whole time. Figures. It's unfair because I just dealt with the other being pregnant, constantly hearing about it from my in-laws. Seems as if it's never going to stop. The new score is 3, 2, and me still with 0.

I can't ever set foot in my in-laws house again with baby this, baby that, baby on the wall. EVERY FUCKING WHERE. Just feel like such an infertile outcast because I can't conceive shit. I don't even know if I can ever get pregnant.

This time I feel like someone ripped out my heart then smashed it in front of me with a hammer.

I fear that I'm going to die a depressed, anxiety ridden, childless old woman. It seems that life never gets fair. Praying to god doesn't get me a baby, letting go of the stress doesn't get me a baby, and even fucking having sex doesn't make it happen either. :(

I'm stuck in a dead end job that pays next to nothing and I can't get pregnant. What a blessed life I have. Not.