*Warning*
Please excuse my talk of blown out vagina, broken arsehole, and all profanities. There will also be a little talk of my newborn, he is pretty neat, but I will not go on and on.
Labour and delivery was 13 hours. They let me push for hours, which led to vaginal mush (OB's words) and a blown out arsehole. Thank god I elected for an epidural, as the doctor was down there reconstructing my lady bits for a half hour. The good doctor also loaded me up with narcotics, which I ran out of the other day. Boooo. Unfortunately it still hurts to have a BM. It feels like I'm passing chef knives through my rectum. Don't worry, I'm not whinging...in fact I see the humor behind it now! I'd gladly do it again, because my son is indeed worth it.
One odd thing I pointed out in LD was there was a large mirror in my room facing the bed. Who in their right mind wants to see their unshaved fanny in the mirror?!! I made MIL stand in front of it, so I wouldn't have to catch sight of my unkept lady bits. Yes, she begged me to attend the birth. I couldn't say no, as my husband would be displeased. She ended up being her usual overbearing self, in which my mother was unimpressed. If there happens to be a next time, I will not allow a party in LD.
......
As I've mentioned before, you still continue to receive unsolicited advice from mothers who know it all, because they've raised 5 children, breastfeed twins till they were 3 years of age, etc. One of the things every mother can get on a soapbox about is breast feeding. My husband was up my arse to do it, because it is natural. I believe it's because MIL encouraged it. She asked me every time about it. I will say I gave it a good try, but it wasn't for me and my son. Once we got it down, he wanted to feed every hour. In which I could not keep up with his demand, and didn't feel like getting even less sleep or being his dummy. Everyone says, "Breast is best!". For fucks sake, it even said on the side of the formula can! If a woman can keep up with supply and demand, more power to her. It's not my cup of tea.
All and all everything is good. Yeah, pregnancy can be rough (I had it easy) and newborns can be challenging in terms of postpartum depression and colic. With that being said, I'd still go on to say it does not compare of the devastating journey of IF. Not even close.
Aaaah, if only I'd read this before my OB decided I could go the vaginal route. I wouldn't have been so traumatized..... :P
ReplyDeleteHang in there ripped bum. It'll heal soon. Are you doing sitz baths? Drop that bum in the water a few minutes at a time, especially if you're really feeling the lack of narcotics.
As per breastfeeding. I don't think people realize that if the mom can't tolerate breastfeeding, it's not really a positive for the baby! Besides, you gave the little man the golden stuff, colostrum.
Love that you're loving mommy hood. xoxo
Can totally empathise as with Corrie the very same thing happened to me. I have huge respect for you for being so uncomfortable with stitches yet still attempting breastfeeding. That's real sacrificial mummy love! Don't feel guilty about complaining about pain and problems due to pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Not one of us will be offended.... You waited so long, earned your stripes and should feel free to complain.
ReplyDeleteWell done on getting through the birth and the first crazy few weeks. Think about you all the time :) xxx