Almost 4 years of marriage down the shitter

Now I know there's a reason why I was infertile. I didn't need to have a child with my husband. What have I done? My poor son is brought into this mess. I feel so selfish, because I wanted more than anything to be a mother. It was probably never meant to be. I should have just accepted the infertile card and left it at that.

As you know, fights with my husband are pretty explosive because he has a serious anger issue. I thought we have solved this last year. Apparently, not.

He went out on a bachelor party the day before Mother's Day. I didn't want him to go and he knew that, yet he insisted. I didn't feel like arguing so I told him not to be out all night. He comes home at 4am. I'm so upset and feel very disrespected. I let him in (I didn't have to do that). Things escalate from there, a lot of shouting, and I lost it when he called me an ignorant bitch. You know I'm upset and feel disrespected, yet you offer no remorse. I took drawers of some of his things and threw them on the ground telling him to get his things and leave. He screams at me some more and tells me I'm losing him. At this point, I honestly don't care. If I continue to back down, I'm letting him know that it's ok to treat me this way. Truthfully, I'm sick of it. It's not okay to disrespect me in my father's home and call me names. I think it is abuse. He gives me more threats that he will ram the car with his truck and neither of us will have a car. I'm so close to calling the authorities.

I told him he has 2 hours and he can collect his belongings and leave. I don't want him around me at all, ruining my Mothers's Day some more. What did I do to deserve this?

Happy Mother's Day to me. :(