I keep having nightmares about SIL (I like) and the in laws. In the nightmare, DH and I are living with his parents and his sister with her kids (the newest baby, hopefully the last) are living there too. I try to stay at my mother's and don't really go over there until I have to. When I do, no one talks to me because of how I feel about their fertile family. Every one alienates me. Then I woke up.
While I don't bother looking into hidden meanings of dreams, I can conclude that I have major anxiety about being around my new nephew and being in the in laws home in general. It's not going to even be healthy for me to even try. I'm not saying that to be selfish or rude, I just don't want to be set off. Infertility has taken me to this deep dark abyss of which I cannot return from.
But it's an abyss you are definitely not alone in. You have us, walking around in the abyss with you, cursing mothers and pregnant woman and their sense of inferiority. On the plus side, I hear the abyss serves cocktails 24/7, and if we don't feel like getting out of bed until 1pm, that's also allowed ;) xxx
ReplyDelete" It's not going to even be healthy for me to even try. "
ReplyDeleteKeep yourself healthy. If that's going to do the opposite, don't do it. No guilt.
I agree with every point Steph makes.
If only we were on a yacht in the dark abyss instead of leaky wooden boat. Lol. I'm all for keeping my sanity. Thanks you guys.
ReplyDeleteYou might have a leaky wooden boat, but we're all there will buckets keeping each other a float. Check me out with my whimsical metaphors!
ReplyDeleteBut on a serious note, you can see from your recent blog posts your having a shitty time recently. Take some time to be you, do things that make you happy, fuck everyone else. I wouldn't go as far as saying you have your sanity (ha) but we do have something that must keep us going!! Xxxx