Mixed Infertile and Non-infertile Thoughts

Recent Thoughts

1. When I was at the going away party, there was a baby overload. There were 2 sets of twins, and a handful of 5-6 month olds. Infertile Ingrid was surrounded and literally backed up against a wall. She still felt overwhelmed and anxious as she had before.

2. Sometimes when I'm out in public, I wonder if I make another infertiles upset by the presence of my bump.

3. I hate the way the OB's office is set up like the entrance door is a stage. I feel all the other women in the waiting room sizing me up, as I walk towards the receptionist window.

4. I'm a worrywart. I get nervous every time I get in a car or truck as a passenger...I'm afraid I'll get in an accident killing me and my unborn baby (people in the South are horrid drivers). I'm even afraid when I descend the 3 flights of stairs at my flats, that I will take a tumble.

5. I've learned that infertility is a disease like cancer, for which there is no cure. Both have treatments, for which there is unpredictable results. I wonder when there will be a cure for both, or at least a concrete answer as to why both happen. Environmental factors/lifestyle choices is just a popular answer given, because scientists and doctors really have no clue.

6. While I sat here yesterday getting frustrated at Disney for not injecting at least some reality in there movies....life certainly isn't a fairy tale...I realize that they have done so. For example in the movie UP, the main character and his wife experience a miscarriage. In Dumbo, Dumbo's mother waited quite a while for the stork to bring her a bundle of joy. She experienced sadness and disappointment every time she saw it was not her turn. And there's been some Disney movies that show death. I could never finish finish Bambi due to her mother being shot. My six year old self was distraught that Bambi was now by herself, and I couldn't understand why such an awful event occurred in a Disney movie. Later in primary school, I learned about the food chain. Well done, Disney for the hidden messages. Although they're brief and during some distracting melody, it's still shown.